Striking Out

For a long time I was on Heaven’s prayer line for a husband, I sowed into marriages, observed fasts and even attended vigils. Finally God answered me, sent me an angel in form of a man. It’s a few months after our wedding, my nights that were for prayers when I was a single lady has turned into a worrying session. Will I be a good wife or mother, will he become a good husband and a father too?

Have you ever prayed and desired for something so much and when it finally comes instead of rejoicing over it, uncertainties sets in. You start thinking of what’s next. I remember writing a post on our insatiable needs; you can read it up here. I’ll paint a similar story to the one above. I had applied for something earlier in the year, the application was turned down and I applied again and got a positive response but here’s the crazy part I’m torn in between if I’m making the right decision, I already have a somewhat stable life and here I am planning to move from the known to unknown.

I’m the kind of person who likes everything well spelt out, it has to be detailed but over the years I’m learning God doesn’t always give us a detailed path way, He said to Abraham come, to Peter step out even when his human mind couldn’t comprehend walking on water. A few nights ago I was up thinking worrying on the next phase in my life. I’m at the brink of making some decisions and its scary cos’ I don’t know how it will end up. I literally went to bed with a headache after plotting a graph of possible life projections in my head *smh*. In the morning I thought things through and realised I wasn’t trusting God. I totally forgot I didn’t start the things I was worrying myself sick for. I remembered I had prayed over these things and God brought them to pass why couldn’t I trust Him to complete them.

The devil knows if he can mess with our mind, he can mess our lives up. I literally had to jump-start my day with Words, God’s Words. The day got to a climax when a colleague and I were having a conversation and he reminded me of this interesting mind-blowing story in the Bible ‘The Philistines brought the ark of God from Ebenezer to Ashdod. They took the ark of God into the house of Dagon and set it beside Dagon [their idol]. When they of Ashdod arose early on the morrow, behold, Dagon had fallen upon his face on the ground before the ark of the Lord. So they took Dagon and set him in his place again. But when they arose early the next morning, behold, Dagon had again fallen on his face on the ground before the ark of the Lord, and [his] head and both the palms of his hands were lying cut off on the threshold; only the trunk of Dagon was left him’. 1 Sam 5:1 -4 AMP. I had read it before but it felt different, I had to restrain myself from breaking out in the Spirit at the moment. That was an ark that represented God’s presence and the idol had to acknowledge God meanwhile I have the Spirit of God in me and letting the devil play games with my mind.

This just sealed it for me, I have chosen to give God an advance praise for the things I’m yet to see, I’m not going to dwell on the uncertainty of life rather magnify God and His works. I told my friend yesterday, we give so much emphasis to the devil by talking about our problems when we go to God in prayers, how about praising God. I don’t have the blueprint of my life but I have the mind of Christ, my steps are ordered.

I don’t know what your story is; you may be like me at cross-roads in your life. You’ve got to make that life-changing decision and its scaring the life out of you and you are contemplating hanging onto the safe life you have going. I can’t decide for you but I can give a piece of advice, it’s a lot better to try out something and fail (which is not always the case) at least you know, other than living with the regret for the rest of your life. Weigh your options, go to God in prayers and trust Him to direct you. A quote I love so much from the movie Cinderella Story ‘Don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game’.

Loads of love.

JMAD