I was having a conversation with a friend of mine and he started describing this lady, he was so detailed with the descriptions; you know how guys can tell the shape of a lady’s lips, her jawline, hour-glass body and all. I could sense he had something going for her. Mid-way into our conversation, he drops the word “BUT”, the glow in his eyes instantly disappears. He said he liked her especially the way she carried herself and her good taste in clothes but when he got close to her, she had an ugly attitude that’s just divergent to the lady he had admired from a distance.
This brings to mind a similar episode in the bible, “ And seeing in the distance a fig tree covered with leaves, He went to see if He could find any fruit on it, but when He came to it, He found nothing but leaves” Mark 11 vs 13 AMV. From a distance the tree looked fruitful because of the leaves. We can relate to this. We see that lady or guy who’s well dressed, the whole packaging is top notch, you silently pray your paths cross, and when it finally does, you can’t stand the person because of their emptiness of character.
I’ll address the ladies first. Somehow we are at the receiving end and I’m no longer complaining and I urge you to do same. We have been made to nurture, so a whole lot is required from us. I came across this word a while ago. “My son hear the instruction of your father, reject not, nor forsake the teaching of your mother” Prov. 1 vs 8. It’s the woman’s place to teach the child. Ladies we need to up our games. Been a female doesn’t end in having a good carriage on a six inch Christian Louboutin shoes or getting sucked up in that awesome gown, leaving men drooling after you. There’s so much to be desired and it boils down to character. “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful face on an empty head” Prov. 11 vs 22 MSG. Ouch! What do people say about you? Yea you might say, at the end of the day it’s what you say that matters, but my dear there’s no smoke without fire. Just imagine you have the ability to be invisible for a day, spend it in the midst of your friends or colleagues and listen to what they have to say about you. Now while you are at the imagining phase, pull a seat and have a “ME” time. Re-examine your life. Do you need to go to a finishing school (Doubt any of that still exists) but on a serious note, what nasty attitude do you have (Please be honest to yourself). If you have a mouth problem admit it, whatever it is. That’s the first step. If it’s something beyond your capacity to work on, seek help from someone you can trust.
Now to the guys, *deep breath. You walk pass and the ladies want to bear your surname, meanwhile you’re praying for a God-fearing lady who’ll stand in the gap for the family. You know, that kind of lady who’ll wake up at night and take the place of a night patrol officer, going from one room to another praying for the kids while you are snoring *smh. You are the priest of your home and should lead your family to God and not delegate your responsibility to your wife. I witnessed a scene that brought out the mother-hen in me. A barber in a salon lifted his hand and slammed it on the lady making my hair because of a statement she made. I couldn’t understand it. The salon was packed with adults and little children. If he could do this outside, then imagine what he’s capable of doing at home. A man who can’t control his thoughts will not control his life. One of my favourite Pastors, Pastor Wale has this to say “A man is a failure who succeeds at everything but fails as a father”.
This isn’t written to make you feel bad, rather a reminder that the life you live is a message to the world. You’ll be treated just the way you portray yourself.
Loads of Love.